Friends, Fire, and Stars

I haven’t had the time to actually think of anything creative to say, but I have a bunch of old posts from forever ago I’ll be posting every week or so.

This one is from February 10, 2008.

I don’t know what was wrong with me, but for the longest time I gave up on everything I believed in.

It’s not that I hated God or didn’t want him to be part of my life, I just didn’t care for his help or guidance and said, “hold up, this is me, this is my life, and I can handle it.”

But lately I haven’t been able to handle it.  I wasn’t created to handle it, I was created to do something with it.

Anyway, tonight we (me, ben and josh) made a fire just like every other sat. night, and hung out, just like every other saturday night, and did some stupid stuff, just like every other night:-p, but tonight was different.  I didn’t want to sleep outside tonight just because I am cold enough inside as it is. But I was walking back down, and I looked up, and the sky was a deep blue, a dark luminescent blue that doesn’t have a brightness to it, but doesn’t keep you in the pitch black darkness.  And to my left was almost a sunset.  The sky had that orange hue to it that just made everything perfect.  And there were sounds, oh the sounds.  There was the breeze, just gentle enough to nip the tip of your nose.  And my feet made noises, a steady moving, a constant moving.  The grass below them crunched with a sound somewhere between leaves in autumn and a fresh twig being snapped.  Then as I neared the house, I could hear water in the distance.  It wasn’t rushing, it was just flowing, moving, pressing onward towards it’s destination.  It doesn’t know where it’s going, it doesn’t care to, it just goes to where the rocks lead it.  And my footsteps changed their tune, there was no crunch, but it wasn’t quite a stomp, the sound of the dirt beneath my feet just loving being appreciated.

It was just a beautiful eye-opening night.  And God rushed in to scream this in my face without even whispering a word.

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